Thursday, September 11, 2008

the DEVIL does EXIST! AHHH!



So lately, now that school and work have gotten back into full stride, ive been fucking crashing real hard at random parts of the day. Like in the middle of a discussion with a friend, or in the middle of a discussion at school, just important times to me that i should be awake when im not.

Luckily i have been reacquainted to the devil. Me and the Devil have had a lot of history. I met em when i was around thirteen, i believe whilst i was skateboarding with a buddy around. The Devil stated to me,

"Eddie! Yo! Wassup MOFO! you want to be able to ollie this five stair? HUH! DO YOU! Well you better let me help you out! i only cost around 3 bucks, and i taste DE-FUCKING-LICIOUS!!! So lets GET GOING!!!!" He said that shit in like a wierd semi-canadian semi-new-yorker accent.

So i went inside to one of the maaaany places that the devil likes to rest at, pulled him out of his ICECAVE, gave the clerk my three hard earned allowance dollars, and i took him all in.

I instantly felt wonderful, i felt like i could run for a million and a half hours. Fer real. Than i went to that five stair, and after my first attempt,(push-push-push-ollie-land-roll-away) i landed that five stair.

If you dont know what the devil is, its fucking energy drinks. They always offer me a quick way outta shit for a little bit of myself. ie, when im tired, and falling asleep at school, i go out to the cafeteria and cop a 24oz rockstar(SUGAR-FREE FTW), down that and feel great, i feel like i have EXUBERANT AMOUNTS OF ENERGY!!!! SO then my day goes great the rest of the day.
If i have a head ache, i pop open a can of Lo-Carb Monster, the blue one for you noobs, and drink that, WHAM BAM THANK YOU MAM, my headache is gone.

The point being energy drinks help me function, but do they actually help me fucntion or do they fuel my addiction? Caffeine is one of the most addicting things on the planet, go ahead and tell your mom there is no coffee, see what happens, and to take a saying from Pringles, Once you pop the fun dont stop, until you need another one. But my question for you to think about is how did you hear about energy drinks? No seriously think about the last time you saw a commercial or an ad for an energy drink? Go ahead ill wait.... They dont exist. The only thing that they get there advertisements from is going to concerts, sponsoring EXTREME!!!!!!!! sports, sponsoring MMA fighters, sponsor sponsor sponsor.

Wow, id never think that i would fall to corporate sponsorship, i make fun of corrina and call her an advertisers dream, when on the real... i am.

this is my decleration of independence against the tyrant that is ENERGY DRINKS!!!

I am not going to drink you for a week. cold turkey. ill update you guys as it goes, and im also going to try and limit caffeine all together. Well wish me good luck.

4 comments:

xxsonicblue said...

NO DON'T DO IT. You're going to make the same mistake Karl did, and lose your mind! HAHAHA. I'm gonna laugh if Karl rubs it in your face that you can't drink it.. roflrofl.

Cory said...

sept 11. forget the tragedy (or hoax) of the WTC's and terrorism and dubya and all of that. 9/11 is addiction recognition day lol.

Happy Addiction Recognition to you mY good sir. We are both going to be very bitchy for the next few weeks.

Love, Corrina

Agent Aum said...

tati- i am doing it for the betterment of ones self, and to release the grip that those drinks have put onto me

corrina-i agree were both about to be at each others throats....were kinda dumb....lol

Franklin said...

I've seen a few commercials for energy drinks, actually. I work with Stacker 2 though, so I guess I'm expected to.

We make 6 Hour Power energy shots... you'll sometimes see the commercial for it on G4. You can also take a look at the TV spot at the website: www.6hrpower.com

Have you ever heard of our drink? We'd love to hear what you think of it. It comes in 5 different flavors, has zero calories, is sugar free, and doesn't end with the crash. I hope you don't mind me commenting on your blog, Agent Aum. I just thought I should give you the heads up. We also have a contest going on right now where you can win a PS3 or Xbox 360... let me know if you'd like to hear the details. Have a great day.

Franklin Keane
www.6hrpower.com
Franklin6hrpower@gmail.com