All I have to say is: If I trust you with my vehicle, you know you're my friend.
I taught my little sister how to drive today at the Solano Community College parking lot.
Dear Solano Community College,
When you tell me that there's forty-five books in stock, and I come to Fairfield only to realize it was really twenty-two, suck my balls.
I've been to Solano ten times within the past couple of weeks. They finally get the newest edition of the book that I need, and then they sold out because the dumb whore didn't hold a copy for me. So, I just went to Barnes & Noble and bought an older edition.
So, Solano Bookstore, suck my nuts.
On the other hand:
Here's a little tourettes guy for everyone.